08.19.15finding my voice – part ll

If you read last week’s post you might remember that one of my main drivers to re-write some of my pages was the lack of authenticity. They were no longer serving me and in much need of a change.

It made me realise how much I have changed over the past year and a half or so. The words on my About Me page once reflected who I was at that point in time. However they no longer rang true. My Work with Me page is up there, but it doesn’t really say much. You can almost say it’s non-existing. I simply didn’t know how to capture what I am offering my clients and I just left it. It felt empty in a way because the authenticity was missing and I couldn’t find the words.

I wanted to be able to express me, in all it’s glory.  And this is where it got scary. Because to be authentic and show yourself, you actually need to show up you see…

I’m always very good at talking about this with my clients but when it comes to lil’ old me I apply different rules.

You could say this is kind of hypocritical, and I should practice what I preach. I agree. And if you know me, you also know I am not a hypocrite. The thing is though, showing your full self is plain scary.

The fear of judgement

The fear of not being liked

The fear of not being good enough

I have come to realise over the years that those fears are more or less universal. Collectively we all feel like this from time to time. It’s not always easy to admit this because

we like things to be fine, and

we like to be seen as confident. 

It is easier and safer that way. Especially when the world is watching us through social media, these fears are the things we rather not talk about.

Luckily more and more women are leading by example and are showing us that it’s ok to be vulnerable. Because that’s what it comes down to, isn’t it? Vulnerability. Being able to drop that guard and the wall you’ve built around your heart and show the world a bit more of yourself. To open up. Brené Brown, Danielle LaPorte, Gabrielle Bernstein, Marianne Williamson – to name a few. They are paving the way for us.

Finding my voice

Photo by Unsplash

How did I go from being scared to actually writing from the heart and showing the real me?

That’s where working with Leah comes in. She broke things down for me and made me see that it doesn’t have to be scary. She made me see

that I can do this too

that I actually have something meaningful to share

that I might be a better writer than I think I am

She made me believe in me and my voice. But how did she do this? I hear you say. If you want to know how she works with her clients and what her offering is I suggest you check out her services, however I will share with you what the most valuable lessons were for me.

Just write – one of the key things I have learned over the last few months is to put words on paper. Start writing or typing away and see what you end up with. Don’t edit. Don’t think too much, or don’t think at all. Let it flow. This has proven to not only be therapeutic – like journaling – but pouring my thoughts and feelings on paper like that brought me the authenticity I was craving so badly.

Explore your driverswhy are you doing what you doing? Like for real. What is behind it all? Different people name this differently. Values. Core desired feelings. It are the things you want to carry through all the work you are doing. Authenticity is one of those drivers for me. As are freedom, heart-driven and transformation. I explored these from the inside out. What does this really mean to me? I learned I have a lot to say about all four of them, I wrote page after page. They form a huge part of my big why. Why I coach and and why I write. Even though I might not share all of these words with the world, to have this written down for myself is invaluable.

Read – a lot! Explore old blog post of your own, connect with why you wrote them. Read articles. Read other people’s blog post and connect through leaving a comment. Read books. Read the free newspaper on your commute. This has been big for me in figuring out what writing styles I do and don’t like. What resonates for me. How words can have impact. How I want my words to be read. It put me in the readers seat and see things from a readers perspective. It taught me to always keep the reader in mind when writing. How do I want my reader to feel? What do I want my reader to take away from this?

Finding my voice has been quite the journey. An extremely fun one. An emotional one. A heart-driven and overwhelming one. All at the same time. And I’m actually sure the journey will continue. My voice will evolve and change as I grow. I believe that’s the beauty of it all.

With a few days away from sharing my newly written pages with you, my lovely reader, the overruling feeling is excitement. Because quite frankly, I cannot wait!

Have you been on a journey lately? Writing or otherwise, I would love to hear about.

With love and a happy heart.

4 thoughts on “finding my voice – part ll

  1. Jody Kristina

    I’ve been in the process of finding my voice. Looking back at some of my old posts, they really don’t feel like me at all anymore. That’s the cool thing about blogging and writing is we can look back and see our growth. I’ve recently read a lot of Marianne Williamson and Danielle LaPorte’s work. Amazingly it has unlocked a lot of energy within me. I also LOVE A Course In Miracles, but I’m still working through that one. This post is great. Take care :)

    Reply
    1. Nikki Post author

      For some reason your comment slipped through the net, I didn’t mean to leave it so long to reply. Funny isn’t it, when you look back and your old posts don’t feel like you any more. I know that feeling. I think Danielle LaPorte is incredible, she definitely changed the game for me and I am inspired by her all the time. Thank you for reading my post and leaving a note, let’s connect some more xxx

      Reply

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